I'm thinking of taking up smoking again...

Before you start emailing me to remind how bad an idea that is, do me a favor and don't. I know it's bad and I neither care nor worry that I will become addicted. I have started smoking and subsequently stopped smoking within two weeks more times than I'd like to count. I do not have an addicitive personality that is condusive to smoking. I do have OCD, but my OCD works best with things I always have on hand. I have to actually leave my house and buy cloves (what I like to smoke when I'm not smoking pipe), and usually about two weeks after starting smoking I just can't come up with the energy to go buy more cloves. I'm a two packs once in a while kind of smoker. Not remotely enough to actually threaten my health all that badly, taken with the fact that I don't inhale the smoke as I'm much more interested in setting fire to things and then blowing smoke around and maybe pretending I'm a dragon a little. My smoking would be quite limited as I have no interest in freezing my ass off for a clove, so I'd only be smoking on my walks or at home, and home is a place with many other kinds of distractions that should keep me safe from smoking too much.

You might be wondering why I would have any interest in starting smoking in the first place. Well, sometimes when I'm feeling stressed out enough, smoking is a wonderfully bad way of dealing with the excess nervous energy I tend to get lots of from time to time. The best habits to deal with stress are the most self destructive. I get to cheat knowing that I am essentially immune to the siren call that is smoking. I'm also far too much of a skinflint to see smoking as anything other than the occasional treat, so it's not a crutch I always fall back on when I want to try to stave off some stress.

Besides, let's face it, smoking is fun. I get to play with toys (Zippo), there's fire involved, I get to burn stuff, I get to blow smoke around, and, depending on where I'm smoking, I might get to try to shoot my spent clove at something and get an explosion of sparks out of it. What's not to like? Other than the miasma left behind by smoking, of course, or my mouth tasting like ass. Cloves are about the most actual flavorful form of smoking (other than pipe) I've found, but they inevitably get on my nerves for the same reasons that any other cigarettes do. This is another part of why it's so easy for me to quit after only two weeks.

So I may smell bad next time you see me, but it's guaranteed not to last all that long, and hopefully that stress will be either appropriately dealt with or will just stop bothering me so much soon. Didn't bother me this much two weeks ago, in theory I should be able to lapse back into apathy again soon.